It isn’t often that I can observe my clients during their day-to-day interactions. In my twenty years as an Executive Recruiter, I have observed only five interviews conducted by a client. I found those situations interesting and most helpful. As a coach and consultant, I usually rely on the client’s after-the-fact recollections of an encounter. This is not ideal, as I only hear one side of the story. Sometimes, I am fortunate enough to observe the encounter in real-time. Those opportunities, however rare, result in a treasure trove of useful information. I had one of those opportunities this past week.
I spent some time with a prospective client this week. It was an unusual situation as I was working with another client, who happens to be a vendor for the prospect. This prospect has come to know me through my work with his vendor. Apparently, he likes my style and has talked with me about an engagement. So far, the discussion has been preliminary. I recognize a possible conflict of interest with my current client, which I intend to avoid.
My client and the prospect are typical entrepreneurs. They are hyperactive, creative types. Maybe even a little ADD. Although affable and engaging, they share a common weakness, communication skills. When they aren’t understood, or work is not completed as they had envisioned, they become frustrated. It’s as if they expect others to read their minds. The resulting admonitions are unprofessional, unproductive, and borderline nasty. They fail to provide clarity to their expectations and how to correct the issue if required. I am amazed that neither recognizes the problem, but they aren’t happy with the symptoms. My client has come to the realization that changes must be made if there is to be a productive working relationship with the prospect. Clearly, they lack self-awareness regarding this issue.
While with them this week, I experienced their interactions firsthand. I observed the prospective client’s interaction with others including his employees, vendors, and customers. I observed his interaction with my client and a few of his subordinates. They were interesting and revealing. In one case he admonished an employee for his failure to complete an assignment. The prospect was agitated that the employee had not completed more work, challenging his work ethic. The prospect continued to repeat, “you’ve got to step up your game.” Regarding this encounter, I witnessed the instructions the employee received from my prospective client. The employee did exactly what he was told to do. The prospect failed to recognize the work completed by his employee and never explained what should have been completed. My take on the situation is that the prospect was worried about something else and unloaded his frustration on the employee. Not exactly what I would call a positive management style. The confrontation was a waste of time and detrimental to the employer-employee relationship.
I observed similar conversations between my client and the prospect. Those conversations included contradictory instructions and failure to establish clarity. At one point, the prospect told my client “we must slow this project down,” then later, “you must speed up your work!” Totally contradictory. When debriefing my client, I recommended that he make greater effort to achieve clarification. I suggested he ask questions and take cogent notes. Then confirm back with the prospect to ensure mutual understanding. Simple right? Well, not necessarily. The other point is to make better use of technology. I recommended that my client use email, text messaging and meeting scheduling tools to ensure understanding.
This post is about working through a dysfunctional relationship, the need to improve one’s communication skills and the importance of hiring a coach or maybe even an Organization Psychologist. I will continue my discussions with the prospect as I know I can be helpful. At this point, the prospect needs a coach more than a consultant.
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North Fulton Business RadioX Interview, September 26, 2019
Author of: Fighting Alligators, Job Search Strategy For The New Normal